


Peel The Avacado

by orphan_account



Category: Original Work
Genre: Condoms, Cooking, M/M, Masturbation, guacamole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-08
Packaged: 2018-04-19 15:23:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4751312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bri and his boyfriend, Mikko, decide to make guacamole together, but all of the dishes are dirty.  Luckily, Mikko thinks up a different way to make the snack.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Peel The Avacado

**Author's Note:**

> first: there's only masturbation in this. i mean, there's a tiny bit of cum eating, i guess, too. so you could say it doesn't go any farther than blowjobs and masturbation, even though it's not really a blowjob, i guess
> 
> okay, so, do you guys know the guacamole meme with the elderly woman singing about avocados?
> 
> that meme was basically made by this dude named bri (@ wentzturies on instagram), and he gave me permission to write this, so we're good
> 
> also holy potato he and mikko are a really nice ship bc like mikko's got piercings all over the place and he's always like really dominant seeming and bri's like a little bean who's always joking around about his daddy giving him cummies and i just, like... top and bottom, you know? it just fits. i think it fits really well.

Bri was on Mikko's couch, curled into a fetal position with his head in Mikko's lap. They weren't doing anything, really. Bri had come over, but they couldn't think of anything to do. 

"I'm hungry, Mikko," Bri said. "We should cook something."

Mikko snorted. "Bri, we're both awful at cooking, and you know it. If my little baby boy's hungry, though, I guess we'll have to wing it."

Bri laughed, and Mikko pushed his head off of his lap, getting up and walking to the kitchen.

"Well," Mikko said, "what do you want to make?"

"Can we make guacamole?"

"Oh, *potato*," Mikko said. "I should've known."

Mikko began rummaging through the refrigerator, pulling out avocados and whatever else one needed to make guacamole.

"Bri, can you get the bowl and stuff?"

Bri went to the cabinets to look for a bowl, but the cabinets were empty. There were no dishes anywhere. Bri looked over at the sink, and sure enough, it was full of dirty dishes.

"Mikko," Bri said, "there aren't any clean bowls or spoons or stuff."

Mikko looked at the sink. "*potato*," he said. "Sorry, bro, I forgot to do the dishes. Huh. Well, I guess we'll have to figure out something else, then."

"Something else?"

"Yeah. Another way to make the guacamole."

Bri's eyes widened. "Mikko," he said, "is this gonna be like the fanfiction where they make the bread in-"

Mikko rolled his eyes. "No," he said. "That's gross. I mean- unless you wanted to do that, 'cause then... no, no... you don't want to do that, so. We need another way."

Mikko began rummaging through his pockets. After a while, he triumphantly pulled out a condom.

Bri swallowed. "What's that for?"

Mikko smiled. "You'll see," he said. He handed the condom to Bri. "Hold this open," he said. "Stretch the opening really far."

Bri did as he was told. Mikko held up the avocado and began singing softly as he peeled the avocado.

"Peel the avocado, peel the avocado. Peel the avocado, peel the avocado."

Mikko stuck his finger in the bare green flesh of the avocado and pulled out the pit. "Hold this," he told Bri.

Bri nodded at his hands. "I can't."

"Open your mouth."

"What-"

Mikko shoved the pit inside Bri's mouth. "Hold the pit," he said.

Bri nodded. Mikko took the avocado and placed the whole thing inside of the condom. He then put all the other stuff inside of the condom.

"Tie it shut," Mikko whispered.

Bri tied the opening of the condom. He handed it to Mikko and looked at him with a questioning stare.

Mikko began singing again. As he sang, he squeezed the condom.

"Guac-amole. Guac-guac-amole. Guac-amole. Guac, guac, amole."

Mikko had now squeezed the condom into the shape of a cucumber.

"What's this look like, Bri?"

Bri hesitated before pointing at his penis.

Mikko inched closer to Bri, so their faces were almost touching. He held up the condom.

"What do you do with it, baby?"

Bri stared at Mikko.

"You don't know? I'll tell you, then. You suck it, remember?" Mikko paused and slowly bit a hole in the narrow end of the condom. "Did you hold the pit like I asked?"

Bri stuck his tongue out with the pit sitting on top of it. Mikko grabbed the pit between his teeth and spit it into the trash can. He handed Bri the condom.

"Suck it, baby. Suck it so hard."

Bri began sucking the guacamole out of the condom. As he did so, Mikko slowly began palming himself. 

"You're sucking that so good, baby... oh, suck it all... suck that guacamole..."

Bri sucked harder.He squeezed the condom to make more come out.

"That's right, baby... squeeze it all out..."

Mikko pulled out his penis and began stroking it harder. All of a sudden, Bri began choking on the guacamole. 

Mikko stroked himself harder. "Hang on, baby, daddy'll get you something to drink-"

Mikko began cumming, and he pulled Bri's head under the stream of cum. Bri lapped up the cum and then stood back up.

Mikko put his penis back in his pants, wiped away a drop of cum from Bri's lip and pulled him back to the couch.

"Cooking is fun, Bri. We should do it again sometime."


End file.
